


Scar Tissue

by NeonCrayons



Series: Scars Upon the Soul [1]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Good!Felix, M/M, Mentions of Rape, Multi, Scars, Tragic backstory bullshit, Why can't i just let him be evil?, i'm a sucker for Tucklix, trans felix
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-24
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-12-06 08:53:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11597250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeonCrayons/pseuds/NeonCrayons
Summary: Felix finally tells Tucker his story…Tucker offers Felix something nobody else ever has...





	Scar Tissue

Felix had a lot of scars, his body told a story through the marks that littered his skin.

 

Tucker had very few scars, and the ones he did have didn't quite tell the same tales Felix’s did; Where Tucker merely survived his scars, Felix Lived his.

 

Every scar had a story… epic battles, grand adventures! No scar was just a was a mark, they were his trophies of survival against unbelievable odds.

 

Well, most of them anyway… some told a different story. Tales of long before he was a cocky and slightly psychopathic merc with a bad mouth, but a secret heart of gold.

 

Scars of days before his transition… before he learned to love himself, even when- _especially_ when others wouldn't!

 

Scars of self hate, of depression and dysphoria. The dark days he sometimes barely made it through.

 

“I was sixteen when i finally came out, the first person i told was my best friend; she laughed so hard she couldn't breathe- not because she wanted to be cruel or anything, she'd apparently thought it was obvious, she said the only thing that surprised her was how long it took me to actually ‘come out’.” Felix said as he felt Tucker’s fingers ghost over one of the scars from his mastectomy.

 

This was the first mention Felix had ever made to Tucker about his past prior to the great war, he'd never asked; assuming that if he wanted to tell him he would. “Her family were the only ones to support me when i came out, my boyfriend back then told me i needed to get my head examined, that there was obviously something wrong with me. My parents… they treated me coming out as if it was the end of the world.”

 

“I was a pregnant runaway at seventeen. I couldn't stay in that hell hole of a town after what i went through… bought a one-way ticket out and never looked back!” Feeling his body begin to shake at the memory, Tucker pulled him into his chest and wrapping his arms tightly round his middle; “you had a kid?”

 

“No, I ended the pregnancy  a few months in, i couldn't bring that child into the world, not after how it was created… I'd rather die than go through that!” Felix’s hand twisted itself into Tucker’s own, his shaking only intensified as he went on; Tucker considered telling him he didn't have to go on, that he didn't have to tell him. But Felix didn't do anything he didn't want to, it was obviously important that he tell Tucker how he ended up the way he did; so he simply held the Merc close as he continued to tell his story.

 

“My boyfriend invited me to his family's cabin, said he wanted to apologize, that he wanted to find a way for us to work- all a lie! Once we got there he took me in and i saw that a few of his friends were also there, when i went to ask what the fuck they were doing there he knocked me out, when i woke up i was naked and tied to a bed. They said they were going to ‘fix me’. it was so cliché that if it hadn't actually happened I'd laugh at the absurdity of the whole situation.” ghosts two decades old haunted Felix’s voice as he told Tucker what they did to him; it disgusted him to know that someone who claimed to love Felix could orchestrate such an evil act…

 

Tucker pushed himself up from the bed they were sharing so that he could see Felix’s face, moving one of his hands to cup the side of his face he pressed firm reassuring kisses to his lips, temple and forehead as he wiped away the few tears that had fallen.

 

“I hated when people would say ‘What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger’. They're wrong! I Made myself stronger, the people who tried to break me don't deserve credit for what i did, I became strong for me, not because of them! I'll rot before i give anyone else credit for what i worked for, what I bled for! I overcame my fears, i made myself into who i am today all on my own. I don't owe anyone anything.”

 

Pushing Tucker away lightly; Felix sat himself up against the wall before pulling Tucker into his lap. “I'm a broken mess of a person, full of rage and crazy that will never go away… are you sure that I'm really someone you want in your life? As more than just a warzone fling? Because I'll tell you right now- I'm not an easy person to love. This is your out, the chance to take back that confession from earlier now that you've heard what a mess I am… because if you want this to be more then that there will be no backing out later, I'm giving you this one chance to back out.”

 

Tucker cupped Felix’s face between his hands and smiled his cute lopsided smile “if i wanted anything easy; do you really think I'd still be with this group of idiots? Easy is boring. Your extraordinary! And… I think I'm in love with you.” With that Tucker closed the gap between them in what he'll later call a deep and passionate kiss, whereas in actuality they're kiss was messy and uncoordinated, filled with emotions nether was very good at voicing. They kissed like that until they needed to part for air.

 

“I love you Felix.” Tucker said between deep breaths.

 

“Isaac.” At Tucker’s confused look Felix smirked “my name is Isaac, Felix is just a Codename.”

 

Tucker took a moment to let that final confession sink in; to understand exactly what he was being given. “Well, then. Isaac, I'll tell you again I. Love. You. And I'll say it as often and as loud as you need, because those words are yours now! They will never belong to anyone else. They belong to you and you alone! I'm not going anywhere ”

 

A bright red blush covered the Mercs face at the confession, he didn't think there were words in any language to describe how what Tucker was giving him made him feel; the two kissed a few more times, slow and soft unlike most of the kisses they'd shared. Soon enough they were curled up together between the sheets.

Once he felt Tucker’s breathing even out and he'd pushed back all his flight instincts, Felix pressed a kiss into his neck and whispered his own confession of love into his skin.

 

“I love you too…” Isaac hadn't said those four words to anyone in twenty years… but for Lavernius Tucker, they felt right. They were his now, and so was he.

**Author's Note:**

> Wow. 
> 
> Okay, so this was meant to be for RvB Trans-Week, but now i have this whole story in mind that I'm gonna write! So think of this as a small taste of what's to come! 
> 
> I have begun writing the first chapter off the full story and hope to have it done soon!! The full story is going to be called ‘What Once was Broken’ and the Serise Univers is gonna be called ‘Scars Upon the Soul’ I’m hopeing to do three full length storys, one set during Chorus, one Pre-Mercs and the last on Post Chorus. 
> 
> Just a Warning now: This will get very dark! Touching on inner psyc of a psychopath, the dammage from not attaining help affter a trauma and manny more similar theams. All chapters will come with Trigger warnings! 
> 
> On another rather important note, I am not trans, though I am Gender Non-conforming. And in saying that if there are any Trans-Boys reading this (Trans girls too!) I would really aprisiate feedback on how I portray Felix in this fic!!! AND!!!! I would also if it begins to come off very fetishy! I am doing my best to avoide this!


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